I am Michael Bolton



Proof: I was listening to Jay-Z (well, the Grey Album) while driving in my Ford Focus to work as an IT consultant while wearing my usual uniform of a blue button down shirt and completely generic khakis.

Further Proof: I’m white, live in a small town in Illinois, and my name is Michael.

Give me some credit – at least I realize how pathetically out of touch I am.

(If you haven’t seen Office Space, none of this will make any sense.)